So the job is going well. Life is still moving at a steady pace and I'm kinda ready for it to take a bit of a break, but I can't really complain. It's been kind of interesting watching myself evolve from a people-less person into a people-most-of-the-time person. Not that I've really been watching myself that closely, I'm not that narcissistic.

Okay so maybe I am.

But seriously, I think one of the interesting things is how I'm still kind of unsettled with the whole people-most-of-the-time scenario. If I were a pocket psychologist, I might say it has a lot to do with the fact that I was an only child raised by a single mother. Since I'm not a pocket psychologist though, I'll say it is what it is and I'm just trying to be. Forget I just said that.

I like this novel concept of building and maintaining relationships (or trying to anyway) but it has definitely drained the time I have for some other things that I love. I guess I'm still trying to figure out how to balance all of that with a 9-to-5 (or in my case a 7:30-4:30 except on Mondays when it's a 5-12:30 or 1ish). I think it's kinda stupid that I didn't try harder to be all relational and stuff when I was in college and the balance wasn't quite so out of whack. I'm not trying to impart some lame looking-back wisdom on any of you sponges out there - just trying to write 'cause I haven't written in a while.

Thoughts don't quite come completely to me these days and I think that is why I have a hard time communicating. It's like they come in pieces, not really in ADD type pieces (or is it ADHD?) ... not all spastic and what not, more like they come slowly, over time, after much consideration.

So amidst all the changes in setting, in aspirations, in atmosphere, in relationships and in thoughts, I feel my life is like one big word jumble just waiting to be discovered. I'm looking for letters that relate to other letters that tie together to form words that are related to other words that complete the puzzle. At some point I will find all of the words in the list but then why stop there? A word not in a list is a word all the same and who knows what other words may be out there. And that's my attitude right now, to take what I find with me, to scratch it off the list, but instead of stopping when I've scratched everything off the list to just keep going ... [falls asleep]