My mom loves corn, probably more than any other food in the whole wide world. White Silver Queen corn is her favorite, though she can definitely handle some yellow corn. She'd probably eat it any reasonable way you can think to prepare it, but "on-the-cob is the best", she'd tell you.

And now you're saying, "so what? What's the big deal?"

The big deal is after this Sunday's Easter dinner, my mom sent seven ears of white Silver Queen corn on the cob home with me. Why? Because of that silly old man (may he rest in peace) and that silly little diet he came up with. Because, in this America, people fear carbs more than the devil himself.

I love my mother, and if she wants to be on a diet that's fine by me as long as it makes her happy. But how can she be happy? She can't have her favorite food! And by golly, we're not talking about strawberry cheesecake here, or man-made synthetic cheesy Doritos. This is corn we're talking about!!! You can't get much more natural than what the pilgrims and indians ate at the first Thanksgiving.

I know and understand that even natural foods can be bad for you. But we've been eating this stuff for 200 years now (we being "Americans"). Aren't we living longer than we used to? Yeah modern medicine helps, but that surely isn't overwhelming evidence that corn hurts! I'm just really tired of the obsession with carb counting. And I know how cliche it has become to complain about the Atkins and South Beach diets. But after all of the giving, giving, and more giving from my mother over my 23 years, at the very least this is the one thing I should be able to say "no" and push back at her.

Besides, what the crap am I gonna do with seven ears of corn?